New Toy

by Derek Morrison

DandyHorseDraisineSmallI have a new toy and it’s very very light
It’s made of carbon fibre, and its lines are tight
It has disc brakes and an electric gear
Much better than the one I bought last year.

It looks so good I don’t want to take it for a ride
Messing up its beauty with splashes from the side
But unless I get it out there and into public lights
I’ll miss my five minutes of fame, I’ll miss my bragging rights.

It will make me go so much faster of that I’m sure
For my declining performance this has go to be the cure
So I anticipate improvement, my purchase will enhance
For it’s the same one as ridden in the Tour de France.

It weighs half a kilo less than the one I bought before
But that is reflected in the price, it cost much much more
But viewed rationally it made no economic sense
With each gram of mass reduction equaling 100 pence.

The same sum applied to my losing each gram of weight
Each 100 pence saved, reflecting less food on my plate
Would mean there would be much more to enjoy
From an improved performance on a lesser toy.

[To listen to this verse select below]

 

Lance

by Derek Morrison

Hi, it’s me; my name is Lance
Former God of Tour de France
I was once the one to beat
No! No! I didn’t cheat
I was once the media pet
Not treated like a Soviet
Now they sue for money back
While I could still lead the pack
My reputation to rehabilitate
I really don’t deserve this fate
Why Faustian pact did the devil sell
Now trying to pull me down to hell
Hi, it’s me; my name is Lance
Former God of Tour de France
Hi, it’s me; my name is Lance
Former God of Tour de France
Hi, it’s me; my name is Lance
Former God of Tour de France
Hi, it’s me……..
………………….

[To listen to this verse select below]

Commentary

There is a wealth of material about Lance Armstrong. The story and lawsuits rumble on, e.g. see http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/cycling/31495246. The inspiration here was the tragic lead character in Christopher Marlowe’s Dr Faustus.

Iron Man

by Derek Morrison

Exercise junky
Multi-marathon man
Endurance cyclist
Part of plan.

Training sorted
Muscles tuned
Supplements swallowed
Nutrients spooned.

Out all weathers
Wind and rain
Ignore discomfort
Feel no pain.

All prizes won
All plaudits received
All now gone
Past is grieved.

Endurance build
Played its part
Such big muscles
Included heart.

Train for marathons
Long distance rides
Some transient injury
Heart’s silence hides.

With recovery time
Of just a week
Return to normal
Heart back to peak.

But …

On frequent challenge
I once did thrive
To lead endurance
You need such drive.

After years of silence
Now pump complains
Can no longer repair
Such repetitive strains.

Heart fibrous tissue
Bad electrical fluxion
Risks irregular rhythms
From faulty conduction.

Artery walls stiff
Things looking black
Furring up risks
Stroke or heart attack.

We endurance veterans
Who train to extreme
Risk such silent injury
That ruins the dream.

So exercise junky
Multi-marathon man
Endurance cyclist
Best review the plan.

[To listen to this verse select below]

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